I just read online that yet another sperm donor is going to be potentially forced to pay child support for the child he helped to create. This is on the heels of a similar story out of Britain, where yet another man is being told to fork over significant amounts of cash to the lesbian parents of a child he helped bring into the world.
Edit: Dana Rudolph over at Mombian offers her insight on this topic over here.
I don't get it! I really don't. These women are giving lesbians who use a KD a bad name - the worst name. I want to believe that our KD knows us well enough to know that we would never, ever in a million years even consider going after him for child support. But I'm sure the men in these stories thought that about their "friends" too. And yet here they are, years later, taking the poor guys to court. It makes me sick to my stomach.
It is a giant leap of faith for these men to agree to be a donor. It's a giant leap of faith for everyone involved to have a KD. I can't wrap my brain around the kind of evil it takes for these women to backstab their donors like that. What angers me the most is that they'll say they're doing it "for the good of the children." What the hell kind of example are you trying to set for your kid, ladies?!
Thank God we have a notorized contract, but damn Michigan and their lack of second-parent adoption laws!
In other news, the first TWW is in full swing and we are just about to wrap up week one. We've both been very busy with work and spending time with friends, so thankfully it has gone by pretty fast. We determined that we'll probably do our first HPT on Sunday, since it'll be 10 DPO. We'll splurge on one of the "First Response" HPTs and then buy a bunch of dollar tree sticks as backups. I've heard that the dollar store ones are actually as effective as the fancy schmancy ones, so we'll see. I've yet to go to peeonastick.com to actually research which are the cheapest and most effective HPTs. Perhaps tomorrow.
I have been obsessed with watching J for signs of baby, though. For every odd thing that comes up, the first thing I think is "OMG, she's pregnant!" For example, yesterday at dinner she told me that she smelled beef during lunch the other day and actually wanted to eat it. With HP sauce. See?! OMG SHE'S PREGNANT. Or not. But she could be! Every five minutes I ask her if she feels different, if her boobs hurt, if she feels life growing from within. But no. Nothing yet.
And still we wait.
[sigh]
3 comments:
I saw those stories yesterday or the day before. They are quite scary.
As for the week going "fast," I think that is a relative term!
I remember being obsessed with watching Kim for signs of pregnancy too. Every little thing seemed soooo significant! I'm really hoping you are first-timers!
We waited until day 12 after the insem to test and we got a line so faint we thought it was a negative at first. Just keep that in mind if you're testing on day 10. It may be too soon so try again a few days later if it's negative.
Good luck!!!
Scary stories indeed, but I'm sure they are never as black and white as they are portrayed in the press. Some reports of the British story here in the UK state that the man entered into a verbal 3 parent agreement and played a significant role in the child's life until he got a new girlfriend who was less than keen on the idea. Whilst I think it's outrageous that the "other" mother can just walk away from her moral responsibilities with regards to these children, the man too, should not be able to pick and choose which parts of parenting suit him at any given time in his life either.
I think in both these cases, there was no written agreement (which, whilst it may not be binding, at least shows intent) and there doesn't seem to have been much thought given to the implications. It's not just straight idiots that have kids without thinking it through properly.
My worry, like yours, is that it will scare people off ever donating in this way. In the UK, an upcoming law change, if passed, will mean men can donate for at home insems and be treated in law in the same way as they are currently treated for clinic donations - that they are merely a donor, and not a parent. It can't happen soon enough!
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